I lambast others for their devient sexual fantasies but here's one of mine. I find girls with self-harm cuts especially attractive. Particularly those who cut words or designs into themselves. Usually they're just your garden variety emo 'paperclip cutters', but occasionally you come across a serious one. Serious self-harmers (at least females, in my experience) almost always cut themselves on the rest of their bodies as well as just their arms. On one pro-anorexia forum I used to... dabble with, there was one member who was also a cutter (they're usually co-morbid). The cut and burn scars on the rest of her body put those on her arms to shame. I'm not anorexic but it was a psychological playground for me.
Is it some kind of 'predator' thing? I don't think so. I do it to myself to achieve higher states of mind during manias. It's character building. It keeps you physically aware. It increases the vividness of the moment. You sort of regret it afterwards, of course. Having to wear long sleeves in summer and all that. I could never be topless among normal company for example.
I met a girl early last year who was a serious cutter. I've always wished I could see her body cuts but unfortunately nothing ever came of the relationship so I'll never know. I wonder if her boyfriend actually appreciates them for their 'emotional art' value or simply pities them.
I'd very much like a sexual experience that includes 'self'-harming each other in various ways. Methodically though, not just slashing each other randomly with razors (I think Amy Winehouse did this once). Before the climax of course, but increasing in severity as it approaches. This is the only type of foreplay that would interest me. It would have to be someone meaningful though - nothing even close to casual would do it for me. Not that I approve of casual relationships anyway. It would forever connect you to that person, no matter what may come of the relationship, how much time passes or how socially or geographically distant you may become.
Am I alone?
Comments
Fucking and cutting I could see as escalating to a near death experience, which sounds like amazing sex.
Super primal and hot, but not sure I'll be doing that any time soon.
If they don't enjoy life, why would I bother with them? They're clearly too far in.
Self mutilation can have many other meanings than having no self worth or being depressed. A lot of people overlook the most common forms of self mutilation tattooing and piercing! Both of these done for many reasons.. I've had euphoric experiences after about six hours into a tattoo which quite literally have got me addicted to the pain of getting a tattoo ... Even just the noise of the gun get my blood flowing and makes me feel intoxicated .... Sometimes it has nothing to do with your mentality and is purely a physical need ... And I think this is what the OP is talking about ... But with this trust in the person come all those phycological and spiritual bonds he was talking about ... By the way I am not a slasher.
I have no opinion on cutters. My initial reaction is that of mild discomfort.