How to get rid of a garden mole? — Totseans

How to get rid of a garden mole?

edited June 2012 in Life
We've got a problem. Spent the majority of the week doing stuff in the garden, making it all look good and taking care of the pond etc. I mowed the lawn not so long ago too, but I just popped outside to check on the pond when I caught sight of a great big molehill in the middle of the lawn. We've had mole problems in the past but it must have died or ran off to another location, because we had nothing for years. Then suddenly, it's back again - kind of annoying after spending a lot of time and effort out there lately!

So Totseans, how do you get rid of a mole?

Comments

  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited June 2012
    Get a cat, show some mole porn or basically use a trap. I will admit I haven't see any garden mole in Pakistan, I always wanted to see one.
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited June 2012
    a) fart/shit in the molehill
    b) put a load of wolf or other predator urine/scent in and around the molehill
    c) fireworks. 'nuff said
    d) wait with a spade held aloft - and then smack it down onto their skull once night comes
    e) air rifle
    f) mole traps
  • ThirdRockFromTheSunThirdRockFromTheSun <b style="color:blue;">Third<em style="color:pink;">Cock</em>FromThe<em style="color:brown;">Bum</em
    edited June 2012
    A repellent mixture of castor oil and soap usually causes moles to leave an area. Put one-half cup each of castor oil and dishwashing liquid in a jar, and shake well. Use this as a concentrate and mix 2 to 3 tablespoons in a gallon of warm water. Use a watering can to dribble it over the area you want to protect. A castor oil-based commercial product called Mole-Med can save you some of the mixing. Until you get the animals to feed somewhere else, make time to visit your garden each morning and step on all the tunnels around your plants.

    Or so I've heard.
  • edited June 2012
    a) fart/shit in the molehill

    You guys are so helpful! Expect a destroying in Wordfeud in the near future :mad:
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited June 2012
    trx100 wrote: »
    You guys are so helpful! Expect a destroying in Wordfeud in the near future :mad:

    RemadE wins with "cock" :hai:

    Honestly though, imagine being a mole and coming out of your little home to find a cold, hard turd there. I'd GTFO asap.
  • edited June 2012
    RemadE wrote: »
    RemadE wins with "cock" :hai:

    Honestly though, imagine being a mole and coming out of your little home to find a cold, hard turd there. I'd GTFO asap.

    I dunno bro, I reckon there would be a good chance of me either eating it or at least rubbing my mole penis on it... Depends on how warm it was I guess. Thanks for the tip though, I know I'll be coming to your house if I ever turn into a mole.
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited June 2012
    Good lad. Talking of which I took my puppy for a walk today and she did the biggest shit only 3 doors down. Had to pick up that warm, yellow slug of a turd and some of it got on the outside of the bag. Once the turd was bagged, I then puked, so there wasn't much point picking it up. Honestly, dogs are grim at times.
  • NonmaeNonmae Semo-Regulars
    edited June 2012
    If you have a dog , could you train in to kill the mole? Or get a cat? Or some other animal based deterrent, I know cats dislike going in a garden that has the smell of a dog in it, would something similar work with a mole?
  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited June 2012
    You're all doing it wrong, just get a female mole and wait him to come to you.
  • dr rockerdr rocker Regular
    edited June 2012
    Mole traps. You can buy them online, but that involves spending money. Borrow someone terrier dog and put it next to molehills. It will hear the mole and go to where it is. Dig it up and stamp on it. I remember the first mole I stomped. I was 4 or 5 I think. The one thing I remember is moles are squishy.
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited June 2012
    Does this Mole wear a suit and carry a Walther? He might be working for the Russians...
  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited June 2012
    Sorry but would it be considered wrong to use Mole skin as a penis warmer?
  • ThirdRockFromTheSunThirdRockFromTheSun <b style="color:blue;">Third<em style="color:pink;">Cock</em>FromThe<em style="color:brown;">Bum</em
    edited June 2012
    How is your mole problem now?
  • edited June 2012
    How is your mole problem now?

    Not too sure. I haven't been out in the garden in a few days (other than to quickly check on the pond) because of the excessive rain but I think the problem still exists. I think we'll have to get some traps, it's the most effective way.
  • RemadERemadE Global Moderator
    edited June 2012
    Dfg wrote: »
    Sorry but would it be considered wrong to use Mole skin as a penis warmer?

    Not at all, good Sir. Moleskin was once limited to the Gentry :cool: + pipe + whiskey

    Also hold on...when you go to Italy, that means you can...drink and whatnot. HOLY FUCK! I need to be online when you get drunk for the first time.
  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    edited June 2012
    RemadE wrote: »
    Does this Mole wear a suit and carry a Walther? He might be working for the Russians...
  • edited June 2012
    Also hold on...when you go to Italy, that means you can...drink and whatnot. HOLY FUCK! I need to be online when you get drunk for the first time.

    LOL, make sure you get a hold of me when this day comes. It's something I cannot miss!
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