Sorry grinch, your post count is a little low for such a position, help out Madrox in the lab perfecting new "soaps" for the "showers", this should be both fun and informative for you, and I will certainly consider you the first time an individual execution is required.
I shall locate the target and extract the required data.
Ummm... what did we want to know again?
*eats little red pill, drinks from small beaker*
How she is adapting to all these lizards would be good to know, I am having trouble relating to them. Other than that, make sure her sympathies lie with totse, not with the lizards, I mean Zoklizards, I mean zoklet, I think.
Wouldn't the fact that they chose to come here mean that they were already somewhat reeducated?
You have no sense of absurdist ha ha, here have some of these pills, and go talk to some of the lizards, the one in the felt hat is quite funny in a John Cleese kind of way.
The rest of you are doing great work, a new order is upon us. Although we face a mighty lizard problem, I am sure we will overcome it and do whatever it is we came here for.
The rest of you are doing great work, a new order is upon us. Although we face a mighty lizard problem, I am sure we will overcome it and do whatever it is we came here for.
C/O
"lizards don't fly"
* A product called Laxman Rekha. This is a chalk based product that you draw line “barriers” with… and this acts as a lizard repellent. Laxman Rekha needs to be used regularly.
* A liquid mixture of water, essence of garlic, essence of cayenne pepper, and a squeeze or two of dish washing detergent. Some people put this mixture into a spray bottle and use it around doors and entrances as a repellent for lizards.
* A liquid mixture of Tabasco sauce and water mixed in a spray bottle is a suggestion for a lizard repellent.
* As lizards eat bugs, one suggestion is to use a product called cypermethrin to kill the bugs they are searching for.
* Glue Traps, which are not so much lizard repellents but can be used to catch lizards in the house.
* A product called Laxman Rekha. This is a chalk based product that you draw line “barriers” with… and this acts as a lizard repellent. Laxman Rekha needs to be used regularly.
* A liquid mixture of water, essence of garlic, essence of cayenne pepper, and a squeeze or two of dish washing detergent. Some people put this mixture into a spray bottle and use it around doors and entrances as a repellent for lizards.
* A liquid mixture of Tabasco sauce and water mixed in a spray bottle is a suggestion for a lizard repellent.
* As lizards eat bugs, one suggestion is to use a product called cypermethrin to kill the bugs they are searching for.
* Glue Traps, which are not so much lizard repellents but can be used to catch lizards in the house.
*rubs the shiny dark helmet, taps fingernail against teeth*
Fine, get a couple of recruits and go on lizard patrol, don't fuck with Annaleise, we are bonding and hope to have a clutch soon. But the rest can go, the sooner the better in my opinion.
*puts white lumps into corncob pipe, fires up, wipes lizard shit off aviator specs*
Despite the lizard problem we are still green as in go, all segues to the personal impairment department should be met with swift Belgian style tasty chocolate justice. My droogs, this is truly the dawning of a new error. Could someone get me my clothes?, I feel naked without them.
C/O
"When did Mel Gibson start sounding like Mel Brooks?"
My intentions are valid and my ruthlessness knows no bounds.
I will also be needin' about 90 of those red pillz0rs (minus the lizards [except for the neon black ones] of course) and approximately 120 micrograms of carfentanil in .5mcg/2mL doses, from the state sponsored lab. :eek::eek::eek:
Also a Walther P38, 9mm with holster; I promise not to pistol-whip anybody past a coma. And a key to the female's cell....ehh dorm rooms will be required.
But on a side note, geico did help me save 15% on my car insurance.
EDIT: Goddamnit Sanchez put that big ass image on a spolier tag. It takes more than .5 of a second to load this page. And I can't be bothered to wait the 6 seconds it takes now.
But on a side note, geico did help me save 15% on my car insurance.
EDIT: Goddamnit Sanchez put that big ass image on a spolier tag. It takes more than .5 of a second to load this page. And I can't be bothered to wait the 6 seconds it takes now.
*scuttles over, naked, green, and growing a small tail."
Well, I was wrong. The lizards are our friends, release the prisoners, let them make time with the lizards and listen to their silent cold blooded wisdom. I no longer need these pills. I am truly happy.
BANG!
I know it was you Sanchez, it couldn't have been any other way.
*scuttles over, naked, green, and growing a small tail."
Well, I was wrong. The lizards are our friends, release the prisoners, let them make time with the lizards and listen to their silent cold blooded wisdom. I no longer need these pills. I am truly happy.
BANG!
I know it was you Sanchez, it couldn't have been any other way.
*dies*
*Takes command upon the death of CO and begins a new era of oppression against the lizards.
Fellow totseans on this day we embark upon a great crusade. We will systematically cleanse this site of all lizards. We will begin the final solution to the lizard problem.
*uses he vast wealth found in CO's wallet to pay off the tribunal and walks scott free*
*After being betrayed by his own tribunal and with TheDarkRodent free DirtySanchez walks away and prepares for the power struggle that is sure to follow.
Will the death of CO prove to destabilize and lead to the downfall of this government? With the fate of Sanchez's provisionary government hanging in the balance the future is unclear. Will TheDarkRodents counter revolutionary ways cause totse to spiral into civil war? This and more will be answered after this commercial break from our sponsors.
This is a paid program sponsored by ''The Token Smoker''tm
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Believe it or not, the Negro at your party thinks he is being much more tolerant and open minded than you! After all, he is one Negro tolerating many white people, and you are not.
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The preceding program was a paid for advertisement for The Token Smoker,tm, and does not reflect the opinions of culinaryoverlord, most of the time.
We interrupt this broadcast to bring you breaking news.
In a move that has stunned the world TheDarkRodent has shed his skin and revealed to Totse that he is the Lizard Overlord. Reports indicate that sometime during the night he has sent a prearranged signal to his fleet of intergalactic lizard warships. With speed that has overwhelmed the still forming Totse Raid Army the Lizard Marine Expeditionary Force has seized the server and assumed total control of Totse. We have some preliminary reports which describe the capabilities and characteristics of the gruesome but powerful conquerors coming live via satellite from the Minister of Media, bornkiller.
Bornkiller are you there?
Can you hear us here in our secret underground backup server? Bornkiller...?
We apologize but the satellite uplink seems to have been jammed by the LMEF. Allow me to relay bornkiller's report from the teletype relay we received moments before uplink interruption.
Lizards are much stronger than the Totsean race. A single Lizard can deal with 30 Totseans during cyber combat, and he can still do with 10 Totsean women while defending his planets. That's why the Lizards focus their research on how to get troops on Totsean servers, rather on building huge battleships. But Lizard warships also benefit from the Lizards strength. They can take massive damage before destroyed. Lizard code workers are twice as efficient as any Totsean weakling. And if the Tostsean people become unhappy, ships with beam weapons can hissssss the server to calm down the Totse community.
Initial reports indicate that DirtySanchez and the majority his brave group of revolutionaries managed to escape capture as they were away on a drunken spectacle of debauchery...er on remote training exercises at the time of the invasion and are working on a plan to free the Totsean refugees from their plight.
Stay tuned to this station for further developments. We now return you to our regularly scheduled program. And remember, the makers of The Token Smoker makes no guarantees on the effectiveness of their product against dark green lizards.
We interrupt this broadcast to bring you breaking news.
In a move that has stunned the world TheDarkRodent has shed his skin and revealed to Totse that he is the Lizard Overlord. Reports indicate that sometime during the night he has sent a prearranged signal to his fleet of intergalactic lizard warships. With speed that has overwhelmed the still forming Totse Raid Army the Lizard Marine Expeditionary Force has seized the server and assumed total control of Totse. We have some preliminary reports which describe the capabilities and characteristics of the gruesome but powerful conquerors coming live via satellite from the Minister of Media, bornkiller.
Bornkiller are you there?
Can you hear us here in our secret underground backup server? Bornkiller...?
We apologize but the satellite uplink seems to have been jammed by the LMEF. Allow me to relay bornkiller's report from the teletype relay we received moments before uplink interruption.
Initial reports indicate that DirtySanchez and the majority his brave group of revolutionaries managed to escape capture as they were away on a drunken spectacle of debauchery...er on remote training exercises at the time of the invasion and are working on a plan to free the Totsean refugees from their plight.
Stay tuned to this station for further developments. We now return you to our regularly scheduled program. And remember, the makers of The Token Smoker makes no guarantees on the effectiveness of their product against dark green lizards.
It'll take more than a couple of overgrown geckos to take us down.
Twen-ho lads, they are upon us. Damn what happened here? Oh yeah that's right, I took too many of Madrox's pills and turned into a lizard then Sanchez shot me, and I was re-incarnated into the overworm. Wow, not something you would think a guy would forget.
Damn, this place is ruined. The lab barely started running, and the interrogation chamber still has post-it notes on the wall saying 'put chains here'. There are lizard skeletons everywhere, and that octopus was never a part of the plan. Oh well, better just walk away...
Unless of course, some volunteers show up. We need guards, we need prisoners, we need a little light RP.
*Stands on the ashes of the lizard skeletons, dons camo chef coat and hat, puts corn cob pipe full of weed in mouth, eats one red pill*
"Today is the dawning of a new error, the camp may be in ruins, but the fence still stands, and the razor wire is still sharp, I know it is sharp because I lost my key and had to climb over it. The great DFG looks down upon us from his home in P.A.K.I.S.T.A.N. (Pakistani Anarchist Kingdom, the rest are just for effect), and we will de-program as many of the newcomers as we can. We are not about hate, well, sometimes we are, but we are definitely not about alienating potential good contributing members. We are just about weeding out the douchebags, and maybe turning them into lizards, sexy sexy lizards."
C/O
"TDR, I kept your tools, and the mask, I knew you would need them again"
*picks through the rubble and locates an unopened can of Iron City for lack of anything else to drink*
Looking around things could be worse. The recent infestation of Zokleteers has given us insight to the weakness in our defenses and even brought us a few brave souls who may yet muster the courage to take the red pill.
With Sanchez exposed for the counter counter counter revolutionary that he wanted to be and new weapons under development on the Liserd home world we may yet win the day and purge this realm of the warm bloods who arses bleed so easily.
Comments
*eats little red pill, drinks from small beaker*
How she is adapting to all these lizards would be good to know, I am having trouble relating to them. Other than that, make sure her sympathies lie with totse, not with the lizards, I mean Zoklizards, I mean zoklet, I think.
You killed it, you clean it and cook it, nothing goes to waste here, get to it before the lizards chew it up too much.
You have no sense of absurdist ha ha, here have some of these pills, and go talk to some of the lizards, the one in the felt hat is quite funny in a John Cleese kind of way.
The rest of you are doing great work, a new order is upon us. Although we face a mighty lizard problem, I am sure we will overcome it and do whatever it is we came here for.
C/O
"lizards don't fly
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
:mad::mad::mad:
* A product called Laxman Rekha. This is a chalk based product that you draw line “barriers” with… and this acts as a lizard repellent. Laxman Rekha needs to be used regularly.
* A liquid mixture of water, essence of garlic, essence of cayenne pepper, and a squeeze or two of dish washing detergent. Some people put this mixture into a spray bottle and use it around doors and entrances as a repellent for lizards.
* A liquid mixture of Tabasco sauce and water mixed in a spray bottle is a suggestion for a lizard repellent.
* As lizards eat bugs, one suggestion is to use a product called cypermethrin to kill the bugs they are searching for.
* Glue Traps, which are not so much lizard repellents but can be used to catch lizards in the house.
*rubs the shiny dark helmet, taps fingernail against teeth*
Fine, get a couple of recruits and go on lizard patrol, don't fuck with Annaleise, we are bonding and hope to have a clutch soon. But the rest can go, the sooner the better in my opinion.
*puts white lumps into corncob pipe, fires up, wipes lizard shit off aviator specs*
Despite the lizard problem we are still green as in go, all segues to the personal impairment department should be met with swift Belgian style tasty chocolate justice. My droogs, this is truly the dawning of a new error. Could someone get me my clothes?, I feel naked without them.
C/O
"When did Mel Gibson start sounding like Mel Brooks?"
My intentions are valid and my ruthlessness knows no bounds.
I will also be needin' about 90 of those red pillz0rs (minus the lizards [except for the neon black ones] of course) and approximately 120 micrograms of carfentanil in .5mcg/2mL doses, from the state sponsored lab. :eek::eek::eek:
Also a Walther P38, 9mm with holster; I promise not to pistol-whip anybody past a coma. And a key to the female's cell....ehh dorm rooms will be required.
8, 9, 10.....oh fuck.
But on a side note, geico did help me save 15% on my car insurance.
EDIT: Goddamnit Sanchez put that big ass image on a spolier tag. It takes more than .5 of a second to load this page. And I can't be bothered to wait the 6 seconds it takes now.
Can Geico really save you 15% on auto insurance?
Does a bear shit in the woods?
You my good sir, get FATTY's 6 3/8 interwebz points that I took back. :thumbsup:
Could be that, or it could be the liserd bait I put out for the glue traps.
Well, I was wrong. The lizards are our friends, release the prisoners, let them make time with the lizards and listen to their silent cold blooded wisdom. I no longer need these pills. I am truly happy.
BANG!
I know it was you Sanchez, it couldn't have been any other way.
*dies*
*Takes command upon the death of CO and begins a new era of oppression against the lizards.
Fellow totseans on this day we embark upon a great crusade. We will systematically cleanse this site of all lizards. We will begin the final solution to the lizard problem.
I am glad you showed up DarkRodent. I am growing weary of your power and declare you an enemy of the people.:o
*commences show trial and begins a great purge of the leadership.
*uses he vast wealth found in CO's wallet to pay off the tribunal and walks scott free*
*After being betrayed by his own tribunal and with TheDarkRodent free DirtySanchez walks away and prepares for the power struggle that is sure to follow.
Will the death of CO prove to destabilize and lead to the downfall of this government? With the fate of Sanchez's provisionary government hanging in the balance the future is unclear. Will TheDarkRodents counter revolutionary ways cause totse to spiral into civil war? This and more will be answered after this commercial break from our sponsors.
Tired of that "token" Negro showing up at your parties and diverting attention away from you and your friends? You might like him as an acquaintance, you might even have invited him, but now that he's here, everyone wants to talk to him, especially the ladies. You need "The Token Smoker"!
Believe it or not, the Negro at your party thinks he is being much more tolerant and open minded than you! After all, he is one Negro tolerating many white people, and you are not.
The Token Smoker is available 24 hrs. a day, and after your initial deposit you can call on him or her anytime. Once you make the call, we guarantee the troublesome Negro will be gone from your party or social gathering within 30 minutes or the service is free.
The Token Smoker uses techniques so powerful we can`t describe them on television. But rest assured, the job gets done, every time, that is our promise.
Call today and receive, with your paid order, one free Double Down coupon, good for removal of two Negros`or even one Negro and his annoying Whigger companion.
Call now.
The preceding program was a paid for advertisement for The Token Smoker,tm, and does not reflect the opinions of culinaryoverlord, most of the time.
In a move that has stunned the world TheDarkRodent has shed his skin and revealed to Totse that he is the Lizard Overlord. Reports indicate that sometime during the night he has sent a prearranged signal to his fleet of intergalactic lizard warships. With speed that has overwhelmed the still forming Totse Raid Army the Lizard Marine Expeditionary Force has seized the server and assumed total control of Totse. We have some preliminary reports which describe the capabilities and characteristics of the gruesome but powerful conquerors coming live via satellite from the Minister of Media, bornkiller.
Bornkiller are you there?
Can you hear us here in our secret underground backup server? Bornkiller...?
We apologize but the satellite uplink seems to have been jammed by the LMEF. Allow me to relay bornkiller's report from the teletype relay we received moments before uplink interruption.
Initial reports indicate that DirtySanchez and the majority his brave group of revolutionaries managed to escape capture as they were away on a drunken spectacle of debauchery...er on remote training exercises at the time of the invasion and are working on a plan to free the Totsean refugees from their plight.
Stay tuned to this station for further developments. We now return you to our regularly scheduled program. And remember, the makers of The Token Smoker makes no guarantees on the effectiveness of their product against dark green lizards.
It'll take more than a couple of overgrown geckos to take us down.
Damn, this place is ruined. The lab barely started running, and the interrogation chamber still has post-it notes on the wall saying 'put chains here'. There are lizard skeletons everywhere, and that octopus was never a part of the plan. Oh well, better just walk away...
Unless of course, some volunteers show up. We need guards, we need prisoners, we need a little light RP.
*Stands on the ashes of the lizard skeletons, dons camo chef coat and hat, puts corn cob pipe full of weed in mouth, eats one red pill*
"Today is the dawning of a new error, the camp may be in ruins, but the fence still stands, and the razor wire is still sharp, I know it is sharp because I lost my key and had to climb over it. The great DFG looks down upon us from his home in P.A.K.I.S.T.A.N. (Pakistani Anarchist Kingdom, the rest are just for effect), and we will de-program as many of the newcomers as we can. We are not about hate, well, sometimes we are, but we are definitely not about alienating potential good contributing members. We are just about weeding out the douchebags, and maybe turning them into lizards, sexy sexy lizards."
C/O
"TDR, I kept your tools, and the mask, I knew you would need them again"
Looking around things could be worse. The recent infestation of Zokleteers has given us insight to the weakness in our defenses and even brought us a few brave souls who may yet muster the courage to take the red pill.
With Sanchez exposed for the counter counter counter revolutionary that he wanted to be and new weapons under development on the Liserd home world we may yet win the day and purge this realm of the warm bloods who arses bleed so easily.
"Damn, they just turned around and headed back. Oh well, here, help me with these boltcutters, fuck me if I'm going over the wire again."