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Easy now, fuzzy little man-peach, hmm? You ever drunk Bailey's from a shoe?

princessprincess Regular
edited April 2011 in Spurious Generalities
I know what you're thinking. Here comes Old Gregg, he's a scaly man-fish. You don't know me. You don't know what I got. I got something to show you. You know what that is? That's Old Gregg's vagina. I've got a mangina! I'M OLD GREEEEEEEEGG!
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  • princessprincess Regular
    edited April 2011
    Make an assessment.
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  • DfgDfg Admin
    edited April 2011
    Considering my state I don't think it's a good idea. But let me tell you one thing, right now I would love to suck milky tits. I would love to suck the semi warm milk streaming out of those perky tits, I would lick them and bite your nipple while finger your wet pussy. I shove my thumb up your asshole and start rotating my hand to make funny gestures, I would lick your pussy and jerk off on it, I would let my semen lick your pussy fat and then use my fingers and starts finger banging you, when I done with that, I will bend you over and slide my cock you're already wet and semen filled pussy and I will fuck you like a mad man. I will pluck your hair, I will slice your skin, I will bite your fingers and when I am close to finish I will behead you and drink your dirty blood.

    Bitch don't make me post when I didn't get my fucking sleep. I am changed man at the moment, I would skull fuck you, I would take your beheaded head and clean it up. I preserve it and fuck it everyday until nothing is left. I will hang your body outside my house and let it rot. I will piss on your pussy each day until nothing is left but your bones. I will crush your bones and shove them up my asshole and shit them out and then fap using it. I will take your boney skull and use it as a spoon. I will eat everything using it.

    I will fashion a dildo out of your bones and I shove them up my asshole, I will shit on that same dildo and then hang it to dry and whenever some little girl comes to close to cottage I will kidnap her and repeat the cycle and this time I will use your bone dildo and molest her for weeks until he begs for dead and then I will revive her and make sure she becomes stable, I will let her fall in love with me, I will care for her and one day I will take her for a walk and then bind her to the same tree I hanged your body and then I will fuck her till midnight and I will leave her there for days and I will only let her drink my piss and eat my shit to surive.

    Man, that felt good.
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  • princessprincess Regular
    edited April 2011
    I would start innocently enough inviting the neighbors over for a few drinks. After I get them a little loose and open to suggestions, thanks to the ruffies and ex-lax I slipped into their drinks, I would take advantage of their sleepy and diarrhea state. First I'd slip off their clothes and educe them to shit on the couch. Bare assed, no plastic on my furniture, that's for grandmas and sissy boys. Then I'd call them bad dogs and rub their noses in it and send them outside. Then I'd pick out my hairiest guest, probably my neighbor Phill. He looks like a nice polar bear. Rarr, love those gray backs! He would join me in the bedroom and I'd get out the Big Chief Tablet from my kindergarten days. I'd tear out a page with a nice picture of a dinosaur and begin to cut his nipples with the corner of it. Meanwhile, the guest outside would be engaged in a human centipede, in a huge ass to mouth orgy conga line in the back yard. Their slurping ectasy can be heard by the neighborhood dogs causing them to howl and bark. This may frighten some, but it only serves to excite me and Phill. His raging man meat perforates my dinosaur picture and causes me to cry tears for my treasured childhood memory, so I beat Phill savagely untill he cries out our safe word "Banana Hammock!" over and over with his dieing breaths. Now I cut open his hairy corpse like a Tauntaun and crawl inside to masturbate. Meanwhile Phill's wife wanders into the room and notices a nude Phill on the bed. Not knowing he is deceased, she undresses ready for some lovin. So I control Phill from the inside and proceed to fuck her muppet style. I finish off with a good solid voltaire's angry glove and she gives me a glorious manhattan transfer. Then I burst from Phill's chest like a crazed Signori Weaver and proceed to scissor her timbers. Outside the guests are starting to come to and relising they have been eating sloppy ass all night begin vomiting. Their retches and dry heaving are like music in the night and make my moment with Phill's wife all the more magical. I pull a stick figure of a child molestor next to his van out of my Big Cheif tablet and proceed to angerly shove it in Phill's wife's face and exclaim "This is my where he touched me!" as I shove my fist up her ass. She cries and I only get more excited and I put my other hand up Phill's ass and pretend like Im Shari Lewis. Phill was my Hush Puppy and his wife was Lamb Chop. We went to the window and the guests gathered round for the show. I did things with my puppets that they'd never show on PBS. This got my guests forming circle jerks in the back yard. Not wanting to miss out on a good circle jerk when I see one, I lept out the window, dropped my neighbor puppets, and played duck duck goose, except the goose got a mouthfull of cock. This went on all night untill we all passed out, fully satisfied in every possible orfice, in a big pile of nakedness in my shit covered back yard.
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