My pregnant fiancée is going on bedrest, and I need time to myself.
HGMIV
Acolyte
I am 22 years old, and my 20 year-old fiancée, who is 8 months pegnant, is going on bedrest. The baby isn't due until mid-September, so she won't be working or doing much strenuous activity until then. I love this girl, but I seriously need some time to myself. She's very clingy, especially being pregnant, so it's very hard for me to get away. Since I'm also unemployed, I usually hang out with my friends while she's at work, or just use that time for myself. I would normally cherish the time I went to work if I had a job, but even then, she would "need" me to come home immediately after. I love her, and am happy with her, I just need some "dude" time. Even if a friend of mine comes over, she seems to sulk around and make me feel guilty for hanging out with my friend.
Has anyone else had a similar situation? What can I say? How can I help myself?
Has anyone else had a similar situation? What can I say? How can I help myself?
Comments
She has Borderline Personality Disorder, which contributes about 1/2 of it. But the girl still needs to learn.
Take it to to correct forum and prepare to be flamed for trolling as a bum?
Then when you get the time off, you go out workout do whatever you want, but try to think and find more work etc. but when you're back, be EXTRA nice to her, like maybe for an hour etc. This will make her happy and also will enforce the reward idea as well. Try it it should/could work.
Being strict with her doesn't help but you just need to show her an alternate path.
god speed.
lol oh my god. my last ex was the EXACT same way.
or like sometimes i'd wanna play xbox and she'd get all pissy. then i'd get stressed after a while of just sitting with her and just be like "nah, i need some alone time". she'd get all sad and confused and be like, "why do you need alone time? what do you do differently when you're alone?"
"i play xbox"
"well you can play xbox with me there, i don't mind."
so half an hour after playing she gets pissy.
there's no way around it, she'll only drag you down and your future child as well.
Fuck you just said you don't work and hang with your friends while your pregnant woman brings home the bacon, how much more time do you need for yourself? How much time do you think you are going to have for yourself over the next 20 years as you go through feeding, diaper changes, paying and shopping for school clothes, running back an forth ti music lessons, little league, cub scouts, school plays, various recitals, school dances, high school sporting events, and every other thing which that baby is going to demand of your life.
Grow the fuck up and stop being a selfish little boy, your childhood is over and now it is time for to sacrifice as your parents before you. Welcome to the big show kid...
The things is, he probably wants to enjoy his freedom while he has it
Thing is if she is 8 months pregnant and can't work is freedom is already gone. Now ot is time for him to step up to the plate or go home to mommy until he dries out behind the ears.
Well then shouldn't he just have his friends come over so they can just chill?
I mean, it WILL be a while for him to get a job.
What is wrong with that? I'm pretty sure if there was something wrong (YET), he wouldn't even be posting this.
I don't have any kids, and I don't plan on having them in my prime, kthnx
It's called priorities son. Your's no longer matter. Everything you do now should be about the well being of your child. Too much for you? Well I hope you have money on deck because you're going to need it to pay your child support.
If you do stick around for your child, don't think the weekend is party time. Blowing your money and wasting your time on booze or drugs is tantamount to stealing from your child. Money better spent on clothes, food, and toys. Time better spent changing diapers and playing in the floor. Don't steal from your baby. I promise you that you won't regret the sacrifices you need to make to be a father.
My son lights up like a Christmas tree when I come home from work tired as hell and play with him first thing when I walk through the door. I wouldn't trade that boy's laughter for anything in the world.
My son is only 18 months old. I know exactly what you're going through. You want to talk about it anytime just let me know.
Good choice on your part. I waited until I was 30 and now that I am 49 I have had my 20's to myself and have another 25 to 30 years to do it again.
QFT and to shake your hand. I too was a single father for about 5 years (son was age 2 - 7) and I know the sacrifices you are making right now. Shit makes you grow up in fat hurry don't it bro?
Once more this man is spot on. Either way you are going to sacrifice your time for your child. Whether it be the time you spend with them as you help guide their life in positive directions or the extra time you have to work in order to earn enough to survive on after paying child support. So you may as well spend the time the first way, at least that way you get something in return, the love and respect of your child and their children. Someday, many years from now, you will come to know the true value of that whether you have it or not. Probably more so if you don't.
But you will regret it if you don't make those sacrifices.
There is nothing that makes a man feel more important than the love and respect of his sons.
I would definitely want to keep in touch with good friends so that we could just sit out on the porch and talk about a bunch of nonsense. Stuff like the past, you know? I would want to look back on how I've spent my life then. One thing I can guarantee for my future is the fishing. I would love to go on fishing trips with my son/daughter occasionally.
so, good luck with that.
^LOL TROLL
This is a serious discussion forum and a good thread. Please reserve this type of posting for HB and B&M in the future.
HE'S TROLLING YOU.
:facepalm:
Dude, that was a serious reply to a serious post.
You don't even know what trolling is, and besides, just cause I have a thread testing the waters of this new totse doesn't mean I am a troll.
Hopefully you make the right choices OP.
Whether you feel he is trolling you or not there is some good advice in this thread for young expecting fathers. SG is for serious discussion and respone to topics that don't quite fit anywhere else and not an HB playground for others to shit in when they feel a thread is not up to their standards.
This is not my section so I will not infract or warn you but if you insist on ignoring my requests I will report you. Please understand this is how we want things on totse.info for the good of the community.
Sure it was. ALL of your troll posts here on .info are serious, right? Wanker.
Wow.
1.) I never said this thread wasn't useful. All I did was point out an obvious Zoklet troll that has been spewing shit throughout totse.info since Zok went down. I have every right to do so. I know you have a personal connection to this thread because you're a divorced father, etc.
2.) What kind of mod publicly admonishes someone for calling out a troll? Try a PM next time.
3.) You're actually suggesting that I be infracted for posting "LOL TROLL", on totse.info of all places?
What the fuck is wrong with you? I think you're confusing this place with Zoklet. Perhaps the recent invasion has infected you? If you really want this place to remain a ghost town, then keep it up. Jesus Christ.
:facepalm:
Out of all the retarded posters I've met on totse...
Cry harder bitch
Now lets this thread back on topic :mad: I was enjoying reading it!