Bad Ideas (legal) — Totseans

Bad Ideas (legal)

Know what to do during the weekend, but stuck when it comes to the rest of
the week? Your troubles are over. But we want to see you people out there
trying this stuff, really. No excuses.

At easter, make Ex-Lax bunny molds and distribute them at nursing homes.
Mow a dirty word in your lawn.
Steal stuff from Chess King and pretend to be really bummed if you get
caught.
Self liposuction.
Pour a little of everything in you medicine cabinet into the toilet bowl and
inhale.
Do laps around the Burger King Drive-Thru window.
Give yourself paper cuts for pleasure.
Put salt on a bird's tail.
Lawn job the University president.
Attend open Greek rush meetings for the free food.
Go to Cuzzin' Richie's late at night.
Call your mom, pretend you're the police, and tell them you were found dead.
Dye your jeans.
Write a resume in crayon.
Sell your extra chromosomes.
Find the phallic symbols in "Alladin".
Buy 00 cent English Muffin Sandwiches and coffee and Dunkin' Donuts.
Macrame.
Start a foil ball.
Make your own Tub monkey.
Watch the movie "Eat the Rich" and plan your own revolution.
Light off a brick of fireworks in front of your friend's house.
Call your professors at 4 a.m. and ask about upcoming assignments.
Request Genesis during Sonic Occurances.
Throw snowballs at the short bus.
Test a friendship.
Add a silent number to your name - i.e. Th3om.
Challenge the women's crew team to a rematch.
Steal lawn ornaments.
Take a survey of how many people look at the toilet paper when they wipe.
Cross breed with indigenous wildlife.
Try to store your food like the Vikings did (what you're thinking is
probably right).
Eat your hands.
Yell swear words when the bank teller leaves the drive-up window.
Rearrange the pub tables to spell something.
Do your laundry and cook food at other people's parties.
Get a tattoo of a hickey.
Order free stuff under a false name.
Ski the cocoa snow.
Douse your cat with water and put tape on its paws.
Toast a friend with two glasses of your urine.
Check out all the books at the library and cram them all into the book
return four weeks later.
Grow your own penicillin.
Pour salt on slugs.
Eat at Jack-in-the-Box and ask for it rare.
Practice parallel parking.
Make your own beer. You don't have to 21 to buy the equipment.
Commune with your Chia pet.
If you're male, pee with the seat down; if female, pee standing up.
Mosh at a funeral.
Staple your cat to another cat.
Floss.
Call all the girls who pass you in the pub "Jen" and see how many respond.
Atari Hockey.
Go to pet stores and knock on the fishtanks.
Work up a blister just to pop it.
Rollerskate.
Volunteer at a soup kitchen and don't show up.
Corn starch and water... hours of fun.
Make your own potassium nitrate bomb.
Form a band, everyone has a band.
Buy a goldfish and eat it in the store.
Deliver a baby with tongs.
Eat your food while you shop at the Durham Market Place.
Put a circuit breaker in backwards.
Drown yourself in your enemy's pool.
Think about one thing for six hours straight.
Go to Chuck E. Cheese's drunk.
Plagiarize something.
Sell oregano to junior high kids.
Fast for no reason.
Drink Bosco.
Rent all eight "Wrestlemania"'s.
Start a toe nail collection.
Stick your finger in your belly-button and smell it.
Put a Nike swoosh on you Doc Martens.
Change your horoscope sign.
Try Prozac.
Think of all the different ways to feather your hair.
Lick your mate's armpit.
Write your name with urine in the snow.
Pluck your eye-brows like Mr. Spock's and ask people how it looks.
Play with a tooth until it falls out.
Ponder where the one calorie in a can of Diet Coke is.
Smoke catnip.

http://www.jokesdigest.com/cgi-bin/jokepage1.cgi?jid=1667

|||Psykadelic|||

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