It's September 23rd

Bring on the zombies. I'm sitting in my concrete bunker surrounded by crates of beans and ammo and wearing my tin foil hat. Double gauge.

What are yall doing for the end of the world?

Comments

  • Full body condom and a gag ball. All the zombie puss you can slay tomorrow.
  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
  • Wait, am I missing a reference here?
  • bornkillerbornkiller Administrator In your girlfriends snatch
    Apparently on most zombie flicks "zombies get off on brains", right??? Then I notice on a majority of them zombies attack the living randomly eating arms, legs, the body, etc. But rarely the brain. If zombies stuck to their actual dietry expectations there wouldn't really be much of a zombie outbreak because they would have damaged the brain by eating it. I had this epiphany after watching z-nation and noticed they mentioned how zombies love brains. That totally ruined it for me because I found it contradictive to the fact.

    If we ever get bitch slapped by a zombie apocalypse will IRL zombies go for the brain or would they rather have a taste for the drumstick, breast or even a thigh? If it's the lata then perhaps we need to re-evaluate this whole zombie apocalypse thing again before it's to late.
  • That's what fucked me up about zombies too. If they are bitten then they become a zombie. But 9/10 you see are still intact. Wouldn't 9/10 of them be just a head, assuming they don't like brains like they did in the 50's?

    I mean sure, some people get bit and get away to infect others, but in reality you would think that most people that get bit end up getting ate since it's basically a mob of zombies that took you down.

    Anyway, if it's walkers we stand a chance. If it's runners, and you aren't holed up on top of a mountain kiss your ass gooood bye.
  • Darth BeaverDarth Beaver Meine Ehre heißt Treue
    Zombies aren't real children, M'kay.
  • bornkillerbornkiller Administrator In your girlfriends snatch
    Gen_Why wrote: »
    That's what fucked me up about zombies too. If they are bitten then they become a zombie. But 9/10 you see are still intact. Wouldn't 9/10 of them be just a head, assuming they don't like brains like they did in the 50's?

    I mean sure, some people get bit and get away to infect others, but in reality you would think that most people that get bit end up getting ate since it's basically a mob of zombies that took you down.

    Anyway, if it's walkers we stand a chance. If it's runners, and you aren't holed up on top of a mountain kiss your ass gooood bye.
    Word! ^

    This is all good shit to know because now we can properly prepare for the coming of the bodyless brainless zombie apocalypse.
    Zombies aren't real children, M'kay.
    Hah, yeah, wuteva!.....That's what they said about man being able to fly. ;)

  • Fade in to Grif and Doc on Red Base

    Grif: Hey Doc, nobody likes you.

    Doc: What? What're you talking about, everybody likes me.

    Grif: Yeah everybody hates you. You don't fit in.

    Doc: Oh? I think I fit in just fine.

    Grif: Really?

    Doc: Yes.

    Grif: Okay, then let me ask you this Doc. What's your zombie plan?

    Doc: My what?

    Grif: There's two kinds of people in the world Doc, those who have a plan prepared for when the zombies take over the Earth, and those who don't. We call those last people "dinner."

    Doc: Nobody does that.

    Grif: In my zombie plan, I'm going to Alaska, because zombies have no body heat. They'll freeze like corpsicles. It's brilliant.

    Doc: Nobody else thinks about stuff like that.

    Grif: Hey Simmons!

    Simmons: (at the warthog down below) What?!

    Grif: What's your zombie plan?

    Simmons: I have two weeks' worth of food stored in my attic. I climb up and pull up the ladder with me.

    Doc: What!?

    Grif: And what happens at the end of the two weeks?

    Simmons: Oh, I'm keeping that to myself. I don't wanna risk you turning in to a zombie and knowing what I'm up to.

    Doc: Oh come on!

    Simmons: You still doin' Alaska?

    Grif: You know it!

    Simmons: You'll never make it, Grif. The major freeways will be choked with stalled cars from people trying to flee the major population centers. It's gonna be nothin' but a tasty flesh bottleneck.

    Grif: I'm just gonna have to take that risk.

    Simmons: Good luck to you Grif.

    Grif: Good luck to you too, Simmons.

    Doc: Are you guys brain damaged?

    Sarge: (appearing on the base) Hey you knuckleheads, what's all the yammerin' about?

    Doc: Hey Sarge, do you have a, quote, zombie plan, unquote? Hmhm.

    Sarge: A zombie plan, of course not!

    Doc: See, I told you-

    Sarge: I have thirty-seven different zombie plans!

    Grif: Wow! Now that's preparation. I am seriously impressed, Sarge.

    Sarge: Don't be, dirtbag. In thirty-six of the thirty-seven plans I use your fresh corpse as bait, so that I can make my initial escape, from the legions of the undead!

    Grif: Well, at least I know there's one plan where I-

    Sarge: And in the thirty-seventh plan, I knowingly infect myself with the zombie virus, just so that I can devour you!

    Doc: Sarge you've gotta be pullin' my leg.

    Sarge: Why do you think I carry a shotgun with me at all times? You have to be ready to act on a moment's notice! Hyah!

    Doc: Guys, with all the problems in the world, I can't believe you spend this much time thinking about-

    The Blues can be heard moaning in the background

    Doc: What's that?

    The Blues are revealed walking corpse-like toward the Red Base

    Sarge: Romero's beard, the Blues have been infected!

    Simmons: If anyone needs me, I'll be in the attic!

    Grif: Hello, Juneau!

    Sarge: Wait, Grif! I need your delicious meat for most of my plans! Hey there Doc, uh, you don't wanna give me a hand with something, do ya?

    Doc: No.

    Sarge: Where's your moistest meat?

    Cut to the approaching Blues, talking amid their own moans and wails

    Tucker: Hey Church, how long do we keep this up?

    Church: When they all go in to hiding, grab their flag and run.

    Caboose: Brian... I want Brian...

    Tucker: Caboose it's brains, not Brian.

    Caboose: Oup, sorry, I must have read the script wrong. Moaning... Moaning!...

    Tex: Shut up you guys! They're gonna hear us.

    Tucker: Hey Tex, bet it's been a while since you had some fresh meat.

    Tex: Up yours.

    Tucker: Bow chicka bow wuuuuuuuuuuuh...
  • bornkillerbornkiller Administrator In your girlfriends snatch
    Gen_Why wrote: »
    Bring on the zombies. I'm sitting in my concrete bunker surrounded by crates of beans and ammo and wearing my tin foil hat. Double gauge.

    What are yall doing for the end of the world?
    By the way, you don't need a tin foil hat because a zombies objective isn't to read your mind frequencies, it's objective is to eat them. Your tin foil hat would simply attract light, causing reflection flash therefore attracting zombies........ Not a good thing on a sunny day. :-( Think of it as a zombie solar magnet. ......... But then again, if you are on your own & hidden in a concrete bunker you can wear anything (or even nothing) you like. FTW that's what I say!

  • True.... Zombies do like shiny things. The tinfoil hat is to protect myself from reptilian controled mind hacking frequencies.
  • bornkillerbornkiller Administrator In your girlfriends snatch
    Gen_Why wrote: »
    True.... Zombies do like shiny things. The tinfoil hat is to protect myself from reptilian controled mind hacking frequencies.
    LoL. :D

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